You’ve probably heard the word “narcissist” thrown around a lot lately.
“Steve is so narcissistic—he only thinks about himself.”
“Joanna always makes everything about her; she’s such a narcissist.”
While it’s true that most of us have some self-centered moments, true narcissism runs much deeper. Narcissism exists on a spectrum, and someone only becomes truly destructive when they consistently live on the extreme end of that spectrum.
A true narcissist isn’t just selfish—they’re addicted to feeling special. Their sense of identity and worth depends on maintaining superiority over others, and they’ll manipulate or harm people emotionally to keep that sense of control.
Below are seven common signs that someone in your life might be a narcissist—and what you can do to start protecting your emotional health.
1. They Dominate Every Conversation
Talking with a narcissist is never a mutual exchange. They’ll interrupt, redirect, and steer every topic back to themselves. Even when you try to share something important, they twist the conversation to focus on their experiences or achievements. Over time, this leaves you feeling unheard and invisible.
2. They Have No Empathy
Empathy—the ability to understand and share another person’s feelings—is something narcissists lack entirely. They can’t (and don’t want to) imagine what life feels like for someone else. Your emotions and needs are often dismissed or minimized because they don’t fit into their worldview.
3. They Don’t Respect Boundaries
Setting healthy boundaries is essential in any relationship—but narcissists don’t believe rules apply to them. When you try to establish limits, they ignore or mock them. You might ask them not to interrupt or raise their voice, only to have them do exactly that. To a narcissist, your limits don’t matter because they see themselves as entitled to do whatever they please.
4. They Use Negative Emotions to Control Others
Beneath the arrogance and confidence, narcissists are driven by deep insecurity. They fear worthlessness, so they build themselves up by tearing others down. They use criticism, guilt, or anger to control the people around them. They know what buttons to push—and they enjoy the sense of power it gives them.
5. They’re Charming—At First
In the beginning, narcissists can seem magnetic and charismatic. They flatter you, mirror your interests, and make you feel special. But once they get what they want—or grow bored—the charm disappears. What’s left is someone who withdraws, criticizes, or manipulates you without remorse.
6. They Believe Rules Don’t Apply to Them
Narcissists often see themselves as “above” the rules. They’ll cut in line, ignore social norms, or disregard basic courtesy because they believe their time and needs are more important than anyone else’s. This entitlement often extends to their personal relationships, where they expect constant flexibility and forgiveness.
7. They Believe Others Can’t Live Without Them
Narcissists have a grandiose sense of self. They see themselves as irreplaceable—the hero of every story. They truly believe that others can’t function without them and that they alone hold everything together. This inflated self-image keeps them from acknowledging any wrongdoing or vulnerability.
What To Do If You’re in a Relationship With a Narcissist
If someone in your life shows these patterns—whether it’s a spouse, parent, sibling, or coworker—it can take a serious toll on your emotional health. You may feel trapped, anxious, or unsure of what’s “normal” anymore.
You don’t have to face that confusion alone. Healing begins when you:
- Recognize what’s happening and name it for what it is—emotional abuse.
- Reclaim your voice and learn to set firm, safe boundaries.
- Reconnect with your sense of worth and identity apart from the narcissist’s control.
Depending on your situation, creating distance—or even ending the relationship—may be necessary for your safety and peace.
If you’d like to explore this more deeply, our post on The Narcissist in Your Life can help you understand how narcissistic behaviors show up in relationships and what healing can look like.
Emotional Abuse Counseling in Ambler, PA
At Lime Tree Counseling in Ambler, Pennsylvania, we help people recover from the effects of narcissistic and emotional abuse. You’ll work with a therapist who helps you identify harmful relationship patterns, set healthy boundaries, and rebuild your confidence.
It takes courage to reach out—but freedom, peace, and healing are absolutely possible.
Learn more about Emotional Abuse Counseling in Ambler, PA. You deserve to feel safe, respected, and valued in every relationship.
About the Author
Katie Bailey, MA, LPC, is the founder and a Licensed Professional Counselor at Lime Tree Counseling in Ambler, Pennsylvania. With more than 20 years of experience, she helps people move from feeling overwhelmed to connected by offering therapy for anxiety, depression, trauma, and relationships. Along with her team of licensed therapists, she provides compassionate, evidence-based counseling to individuals and couples throughout Pennsylvania.
FAQs
Can a narcissist change?
Meaningful change is rare unless the person acknowledges their behavior and commits to long-term therapy. Most narcissists don’t believe they need help.
How do I protect myself from a narcissist?
Set clear boundaries, avoid trying to “fix” them, and seek professional support. Counseling can help you regain your sense of power and stability.
Is it wrong to cut off contact with a narcissist?
No. Sometimes distance or no contact is the healthiest choice—especially in abusive or manipulative situations.
Do you offer online counseling in Pennsylvania?
Yes. We provide both in-person and secure online sessions for clients across Pennsylvania.