When Stress Feels Overwhelming
Have you ever felt like life was so out of control that you couldn’t think straight? Or found yourself reacting emotionally in ways that didn’t make sense—even to you? When stress hits hard, it’s easy to feel stuck in a cycle of anxiety, frustration, and disconnection.
During intense or upsetting times, our emotions can take over, making it difficult to think clearly or respond in healthy ways. This not only affects how we feel personally but can also spill into our closest relationships, including marriage. The good news is there are practical ways to calm your mind and restore balance so you can respond—rather than react—to life’s challenges.
Skills to Regain Balance and Calm
Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) offers helpful tools to stabilize emotions, shift focus, and develop what therapists call a “wise mind”—a healthy balance between your rational and emotional sides. One of these tools is summarized by the acronym ACCEPTS, which outlines seven ways to manage distress and refocus your energy.
A – Activities
Doing enjoyable activities gives your mind a healthy distraction from problems. Whether it’s gardening, painting, walking, or reading, these small pleasures allow your brain to rest and reset.
C – Contributing
Helping others boosts well-being and purpose. Write a note of encouragement, volunteer, or do a kind deed. When you brighten someone else’s day, your own outlook often improves.
C – Comparisons
Healthy comparison can offer perspective. Reading stories of people who have overcome hardship can remind you that you’re not alone—and that healing is possible. Avoid comparing your pain to someone else’s “perfect” life; that only deepens distress.
E – Emotions
Shift your behavior to change your mood. If you’re feeling angry, practice kindness toward the person you’re upset with. If you’re sad, engage in something that lifts your spirits. Small changes in behavior can begin to regulate emotions.
P – Pushing Away
Sometimes you need to mentally “put the problem on a shelf” and take a break. Visualize setting the issue aside in a box for later, giving yourself permission to focus on something else for now.
T – Thoughts
When your mind won’t stop spinning, redirect your attention. Try an activity that requires focus—like a puzzle, journaling, or cooking. Returning to the problem later with a clearer head often leads to better problem-solving.
S – Sensations
Ground yourself in the present by tuning in to your senses. Notice the sights, sounds, and smells around you. Play music, go for a walk, light a candle, or enjoy a comforting meal. These small moments of mindfulness help calm both mind and body.
The Impact of Trauma and Stress on Marriage
When stress or unresolved trauma goes unaddressed, it can strain even strong relationships. Partners may misread each other’s emotions, feel disconnected, or struggle to communicate. Emotional triggers can make small conflicts feel overwhelming, creating distance and tension.
By learning emotional regulation and trauma recovery skills, you can approach challenges with greater clarity and compassion—for yourself and your spouse. Healing individually often leads to healthier connection together.
Finding Support for Trauma and Marriage Stress
If you’ve noticed that stress or past trauma is impacting your marriage, counseling can help you rebuild emotional stability and connection. Trauma counseling provides a safe space to process painful experiences, learn coping tools, and create balance in your life and relationships.
Our licensed therapists offer in-person and online trauma counseling throughout Pennsylvania. You don’t have to face this alone—healing is possible, and help is available.
Related Reading
You may also enjoy What Happens in an EMDR Session?, which explains one of the most effective approaches for trauma recovery.
About the Author
Katie Bailey, MA, LPC, is the founder and a Licensed Professional Counselor at Lime Tree Counseling in Ambler, Pennsylvania. With more than 20 years of experience, she helps people move from feeling overwhelmed to connected by offering therapy for anxiety, depression, trauma, and relationships. Along with her team of licensed therapists, she provides compassionate, evidence-based counseling to individuals and couples throughout Pennsylvania.
FAQs
Can trauma really affect my marriage?
Yes. Unresolved trauma often shows up in communication patterns, emotional distance, or conflict. Working through it can help both partners feel more connected and understood.
What’s the difference between trauma counseling and marriage counseling?
Trauma counseling focuses on healing individual emotional wounds that may impact the relationship, while marriage counseling focuses on improving communication and connection as a couple.
How does trauma counseling help with stress?
It teaches grounding, emotional regulation, and mindfulness tools that reduce anxiety and help you respond to stress more effectively.
Do you offer trauma counseling online in Pennsylvania?
Yes. Our therapists provide secure online sessions for clients anywhere in Pennsylvania.